My best morning yet!

I had a really good morning....probably the best I have felt since I got here! I was able to go to the farmer's market with the group at 6am. I became very weak, very easily.... but I came home and had breakfast and felt better again. The sun was out for a longer while this morning...so I layed out in my bikini while drinking my juices every half hour. Then, I actually went for a very short run....yep...believe it or not...I ran. But, then I had to do my first enema of the day and unfortunately I have been sick since then. A group went to the warm pond to swim this afternoon, but I chose to stay here and rest. I am back in bed...but it was a really great morning! Considering I have only been here one week, I feel I am doing pretty well.

One Week in the LUSH GREEN Tropics...

Not much new to report. Dr. Baylac added 3 more supplements this morning. Oh Joy! She spends 30-60 minutes with me each morning...and yesterday she came back and checked on me several times. I had a rough day yesterday, but hanging tough! Please send some sunshine my way...it is still raining! The foliage is so beautiful, however, from all the rain...i love looking outside my windows at all the GREEN! I can not believe I have been here one week now. Love and miss you all. xoxoxoxo

Back to Coffee Enemas

Well, the sun did not last long yesterday...but it was nice while it lasted. I have been sleeping better and feeling a bit better minus the pain in my abdomen. My weight is now stablilzing as I lost 7 pounds in the first three days I was here. But, this morning I go back to coffee enemas so we will see how that goes. I must cut this log short as I need to do the enema and then be ready for a bell at 11am for more juices. I have received some phone calls and have not had enough time to call back...but hope to find some time soon. love and miss you! Aloha!

It is SUNNY OUTSIDE!!!!!!!!!

I can not believe it is sunny outside. I am sitting outside right now using the retreat center's portable iBook laptop computer for patients. I have 20 minutes before the bell is going to ring again for juice and supplements. Then, after that I have to do my next chamomille enema. You should see my closet is full of bottles and bottles of supplements. When the bell rings I get certain supplements out of their bottle and put them in a little dish I keep by my bed. I then go out to the kitchen to pick up my juice and put the supplements that are kept in a refrigerator to take with the juice as well. They have 3-4 refrigerators full of fresh produce!!! I really wish you could all come on a field trip to check out this whole operation...it is pretty amazing.

Bell is ringing....

more later...

I Can Eat Bananas!

Well, I guess I am not alergic to bananas anymore. The last banana I had was in 1987! Dr. Baylac let me try some and I was fine...at least with what they call 'finger bananas' in Hawaii. They are really small, very cute and sooooooo GOOD! I had some for breakfast today.

I also got to go on my first little excursion away from the house today. Margo took me to what they call 'the pond' and the water is like bath water! I got to swim some and little fish nibble on your legs. It was a very short trip only like 45 minutes at the actual pond, but it was so nice to get out and see the water finally...as the pond is right by the ocean.

Overall today was definitely a better day! On and off pain and my stomach is huge...sometimes nausea and dizzy, but I am AMAZINGLY HAPPY!! (I think Dr. Baylac gave me some 'happy' pills!)

Whoo hoo! I am WIRED!

I am super duper WIRED! I was up most of the night, I guess the caffeine in the coffee enemas are making me super hyper. So, Dr. Baylac switched me this morning to Chamomile Enemas temporarily. The hope is to get me more stabilized, rested and comfortable and then gradually ease back into a more aggressive detox approach. We hope to get me back on coffee enemas since they have the substance needed to appropriately open up the bile ducts of the liver to release toxins.

I got a package this morning...Whoo hoo! My friend Diana sent me a box with some more warm clothes as it has been pretty cold and rainy here. She also sent me 'Sneakers' my little suffed puppy...when Margo brought the package to me you should have seen the enthusiasm...I was soooo HAPPY!

18 types of supplements, 10 juices, 3 meals, 2 enemas and thank God for some mail!

The rest of yesterday was pretty rough physically and emotionally, but I was able to get a better night of sleep.

Today was quite a day as well. I have been converted over to completely Gerson Therapy now. Taking 18 TYPES of supplements a day now...some of them up to 10 TIMES a day! One of them is an actual shot I have to give myself once a day in the butt. Then, there are 10 glasses of fresh squeezed green, carrot and apple juicies plus coffee enemas 2-5 times a day. I think the enemas are making me the sickest as I seem to get extremely shaky, nausea, bloated and dizzy right afterwards....I almost passed out one time today. I do not feel too hot from all the supplements either. I started eatting three full Gerson meals a day, too...but have to eat very, very slow and not very hungry with all the juices and pills. Basically every half hour there is some pills to take, a juice to drink, a meal to eat, an enema to do. It is non stop...from 7am to 830pm....so much for resting. I am sure in time I will get used to the schedule and hopefully my body will adjust to all of the medicines.

On a more positive note. I got phone calls from my roomie Steve and girlfriend Yvette yesterday and snail mail from my Dad and Aunt Kay today! These are the type of things that are getting me through.

Get to EAT today!

I had a pretty good afternoon yesterday. The sun came out on and off for about two hours and I seemed to be feeling better so I went for a long walk around the neighborhood. It felt good to get outside for the first time since I got here. I picked some beautiful flowers and plants and brought them back to my room. But, when I got back I was exhausted and had to take a nap. I am not used to being this weak being that I usually work out everyday at the gym. Anyhow, so I slept for about two hours and unfortunately woke up with the shakes, nausea, headache, etc. again. So, the doctor decided to start me on a vary small amout of smoothy....food...I get food...whoo hooo. But, it was like a teaser of an amount but seemed to be what my system could handle so far. This morning I got to have 1.5 strawberry papayas for breakfast. They were so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The doctor just came in my room while I was typing this message. She says I get to have lunch with everyone for the first time...but I will get only raw food. She is going to slowly ease me into the Gerson diet maybe by tomorrow. She seems to think that my body is highly toxified hence why I had such a hard time with the water fast so we will need to detox me the slower way on the gerson diet. There are people here that are going on 7-15 days of water only and are feeling great, but since this was not my case she felt it would be better to take the slower more gentler approach of detoxing on my system. The good news is I get to eat again...whoo hoo. The bad news is it is going to cost me $395 a day instead of $150/day. I knew the price was going to increase, but was planning on it not going up until next Friday.

Body in Hell & Surrounded by Angels

What a day yesterday was. Sorry, but this is going to be another long entry...I need to share and I really appreciate you listening!

After my last entry in here, I proceeded to get SICKER AND SICKER. I had one of my muscle attacks where I could barely walk, super dizzy, tunnel vision in and out, involuntary shaking, pain in abdomen up to an 8 and nauseated. BUT, LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO MY ANGELS:

MARGO, my first angel. Margo is a patient who is doing a work study program here which I hope to do so I can get free room and board when I get well enough if I need to stay longer for more treatment. She came in the morning to take my vitals and later in the day she came to pick me up for a road trip to 'the pond', but I was too ill to go. So, instead she went and spoke with the doctor and Dr. Baylac came downstairs to check on me. Therefore, instead of getting to get out and enjoy the beauty of nature, she got stuck here spending the next two hours taking care of me. A true angel from above!

DR. BAYLAC, angel # 2. By the time the day was over, I had seen the doctor 3 times for a total of about 1.5 hours of her day. Believe me, compared to the 5 minutes with my western doctor when I was in the hospital this was very comforting to have her here when needed. There were days when I was in the hospital when the nurse would have to call my doctor to get her to come to visit because I guess she had forgotten after never arriving all day. Dr. Baylac on the other hand really is full of strength and wisdom yet compassion and light. Angels are surrounding me everywhere! I am so blessed.

Anyhow, so they decided to give me my first coffee enema to help with the pain. MARGO, went beyond the call of duty and went inside the bathroom with me and walked me through the whole procedure step by step...naked butt and all! I will spare you the details! Anyhow, then she proceeded to give me a castor oil treatment by placing oil and a heat pad on my abdomen. My shaking got worse due to the coffee, but the pain, dizziness and nausea started to slowly diminish temporarily which was a relief. I had about 1 hour of more comfort. But, then it was time for my massage...what I hoped to be a relaxing treat, but did not turn out to be so.

Ciappnino, massage therapist, angel number 3! Well, 15 minutes in to the myo-fascia release massage I began to have this very strange tingling that started in the roof of the mouth and proceeded to spread to the nose, face, hands and feet. Kind of the feeling when a body part falls asleep and then starts to come back. I was having painful cramping and tingling and just tried to breathe through it. However, it proceded to get worse and worse to the point that my arms and legs were having involuntary convulsions and my muscles started to curl up to the point where I had NO control over them. My hands were curled up and I could not use my fingers...at this point I WAS SO SCARED! WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG? But, Ciappnino, was there holding me and comforting me. It was another 40 minutes or so where this continued and she tried various methods to help get my muscles to release. She ended up having to literally carry me back to my room as I would walk as if I had MS and involuntary twitching and convulsions. She then proceeded to call the doctor again and I just layed in my bed to rest.

MARGIE, angel #4! Margie is another patient who lives in the room across from me. My door was open so she asked how I was doing and I proceeded to tell her not so good that I was really scared. She then proceeded to come and sit by my side and we had a nice long talk to swap life and health stories. Another gem with a huge heart.

About an hour later, it is now 10pm, Dr. Baylac and Margo came back and checked on me and tucked me in bed for the night as I seemed to be a bit better. It is a big mystery as none of them know exactly what is happening, but are confident that I am on the right path as my body is fighting to heal itself. They assured me that they would be right upstairs if I needed anything...but then jokingly said...but please dont wake us! I unfortunately could not sleep as the pain was too intense, but I was so glad to just have control again over my muscles and be able to use my hands. I layed in bed and watched some Friends episodes with my portable DVD player and I eventually fell asleep for a little while but ended up and down most the night with pain.

Despite the pain and fear....I feel so blessed to be here surrounded by so many angels! More later...love you all...thanks for being out there in cyber space it helps so much...

Aloha! I am finally in paradise!

I made it here safely! I arrived yesterday at about 330pm Hawaii time which is 630pm San Diego time. Dr. Baylac herself picked me up at the airport! I arrived feeling right at home as she does not allow shoes in the house...true Hawaiian tradition! :0) The house is surrounded by lush tropical greenery and my room is small but very nice as she specifically gave me a back, quiet room so I could rest. I also have two large windows since it is in the corner of the house so I can look out and see amazing tropical foliage that blows in the wind and hear birds and roosters. However, it has not been sunny at all since I have been here, so I do hope this changes.

I met with Dr. Baylac last night at about 6pm for my intake and we went over all my medical things and got to know one another. I like her a lot and feel that I have FINALLY found a place that will be able to help me get well. I am currently on day two of water only and I am NOT FEELING WELL AT ALL physically. I have a severe headache, abdominal pain is worse than usual, I am very weak and have trouble just typing or raising my arms above my head, my tongue is gross, abdominal cramping and I feel dizzy. Having said all this....

I REALLY LIKE THIS PLACE AND FEEL SO VERY BLESSED TO GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE THIS EXPERIENCE. I am very optimistic that I will be able to get the care I need here. I am exactly where I am suppose to be and strongly believe I have been led here for a multitude of reasons for my own healing and hopefully the opportunity to 'pay it forward' by helping others heal in the future by my own personal experiences and new found knowledge.

The doctor came already this morning to visit me again. She will come to my bedroom once a day to check on my progress. Every morning when I first wake I have to take my temperature and weigh myself and then someone comes and takes my blood pressure and my pulse. You have no idea how happy I am.....unlike the hospital I get to sleep as much as I want and wake whenever I want in the morning. I get as much solitude as I want in my own private room or I can go out to the common area to visit with other patients. I have not done much of this yet as I am enjoying my down time just unpacking, resting and doing thank you cards.

That brings me to another subject. I would like to once again thank everyone who has been so very supportive. Marilyn brought me to the airport yesterday morning and gave me a list of people who she received some money from to help with all my expenses here. I do not know of any of the amounts as she told me she is going to deposit a surprise amount into my checking account as I did not want to bring a lot of cash with me. As much as I am having a hard time with receiving all this financial support, I also know that others like and want to help. I would want to do the same if I had a friend in need. But, I do not think others really realize the magnitude of how this is helping me in SOOOOOO many ways. Not only is it allowing me to be able to finally just relax and know that I will be able to pay for whatever lab tests or extra days of treatment I will need to get well, but it is showing me how very much I am loved, how the universe always provides if we just commit to doing what we need to do to take care of ourselves and how very rich and blessed my life is!!!!!!! THANKS FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART! I would be so destitute without my loved ones...you are my light and warmth on cloudy days!

Juice ONLY today!

I met with my roommate last night to go over all the house responsibilities and my good friend Steve-O stopped by to say hi. I was up most the night hanging out in my second home (bathroom) and I am very exhausted today. I am only allowed fresh fruits and vegetables through a juicer today....and I am SOOOO HUNGRY! I just can't wait to get there so that I can rest and hopefully have a doctor monitor all my strange symptoms and help me through. I STILL have a bunch to do before I go and do not have the energy!

I got some surprises in the mail today. A BIG THANK YOU...to some mystery person who dropped an envelope with cash in it through my mail slot today and there was a nice canvas bag with some magazines, eye rest mask, and neck rest pillow on my door step. I also received a check from my friends JEANNIE HINE and KATY GRYBOSKI. I am so overwhelmed by all of this love and support. It is still very awkward, but I just keep telling myself to accept graciously.

How is it that the list of things to do before I go keeps growing? I cross two things off and add 5 more things I forgot I still need to do....not to mention the juicing that takes so much time and living in the bathroom. I will be leaving for the airport in like 33 hours....yikes...How am I going to get ready in time?

I am switching over my Blog tonight....so be sure to check out the new look for my Hawaii Update Blog....Aloha...

Last Day of Raw Fruits and Vegetables

I am back in San Diego now. I leave in 3 days! Yikes. Today is my last day to EAT any food. Tomorrow I start the juice only part of the water fast prep diet. Fortunately, I already have a juicer; so I will be juicing all the fruits and vegetables I have left to eat. I am definitely not feeling so hot, I can tell you that, as I guess my body is starting to detox and I feel loopy. I feel like all my chemicals are out of balance in my body and brain. I am having trouble focusing and yet I have soooooo many things I need to do to get ready to go.

A BIG THANK YOU to my one and only GREAT relative....and she is the GREATEST of Great...AUNT MARY. I have not seen her in like 28 years....anyhow...she gave me a check this morning to help with my medical costs so that I can stay longer in Hawaii at the retreat center if I need to.

I am in Palm Springs

I spent the day today with my Aunt Kay and Uncle John. I have not seen them in like 13 years or so? It was sooooooooooooooooo good to see them...I have missed them so much. We went out to eat breakfast and dinner and I am on my raw food only diet...and it has not been easy around all this good food in the restaurants. Still trying to get a hold of my doctor...they told me to call back at 930pm our time which is 630pm Hawaii time. I have been feeling ok but not great today, but seeing my aunt and uncle made everything better.

I still have a bunch to do when I get back home to get ready to go, but I would not have missed this for the world.

Full, Busy Day Today!

Day one of raw food only and I am exhausted, but it was a pretty good day for me. I spent all day with my sister at a rubberstamp convention at the del mar fair and then drove the rest of the way up to Carlsbad to my Dad's place. Then, my Dad and I left to drive over here to Palm Springs to see my Great Aunt Mary! We arrived here at about 30pm. I have not seen her since I was about 13 years old...and the time before that I was like 5! She is 81 years old and such an amazing spirit and has more energy than I do! Really fun to be around. She actually lives in Wyoming where my Dad is from, but comes here to stay for like 6 weeks each year. Tomorrow I get to see my Aunt (Dad's sister) and my Uncle (her husband). I am so excited to see them it has been WAY too long.

3am...still up packing....

I am not feeling well physically as I have been in a lot of pain in my abdomen and other strange symptoms. I am so exhausted, I am not really sure how I am still going...I guess adrenaline. I need to just rest, but I still have 5 days now of hundred things to do. I just spent about 6 hours shopping, cleaning, cutting up and preping fruits and vegetables for the next 3 days worth of meals as I leave in about 4 hours and will not get back until monday night at the earliest. So, since I will be gone all weekend with family and they will most likely be eating out a lot I had to pack all my own food for 3 days. Starting today, Saturday, I am on RAW food only. This is a lot of work....just to eat. So, I have not even started packing my clothes, etc. Still have not gotten my taxes started. I am going to go to bed now for 2 hours and then get back up at 5am to pack, shower, etc as I just do not have the strength right now.

A week from today I will be in Hawaii!

Well, I just made it through day two of vegetables and fruit only....and I am already starving! I am not sure how I am ever going to make it at this point when exactly a week from today I will be JUST starting the water ONLY fast! arrrgggghhh! I also can not believe that a week from now I will be sleeping in a strange bed in a strange house....in the middle of the tropics....that part I am excited about...I LOVE the TROPICS! Lush greenery, waterfalls, rainbows, fresh warm air...if anything will heal me, that will!

A BIG thank you goes out for more generous donations. Just yesterday and today I have received more support from Pat Kreder, Patrick K., Leslie, Johh S. (bearded John), Linda M. and Bob! WOW...this is really overwhelming...but since my pay it forward revelation I am accepting graciously, knowing now I can hopefully not worry so much about the large clinic bill and just focus on getting better. Knowing that down the line I can turn around and pay it forward!

Ok off to bed...tomorrow is a very big day....only 29,000 things to do...more later....

First Day on Water Fast Prep Diet

Today I start the water fast preparation diet. Three days of ONLY fruits and vegetables (raw or cooked), then three days of fruits and vegetables (raw only), then two days of fruits and vegetables (juiced only) and then finally the day I travel (a week from tomorrow) I will be on water only. The water only fast will continue for what Dr. Baylac says a minimum of 10 days depending on how my body responds. This is to try to allow my bowels to rest and heal since they are so overactive before we start the Gerson Therapy Program.

Pay It Forward

Ok. I think I have a better handle on this RECEIVING thing for now. I had a revelation after speaking to my therapist and sleeping on it last night and then meditating this morning. Here is the deal. I am a giver and a healer by nature. As a child I was always trying to help others and create peace and as an adult I have always been in the healing professional; first working with teenagers for 10 years and then doing energy healing and massage therapy for the last 7 years. Through the years, I have also always worked very hard on healing myself and becoming a better person, but not usually ever above helping others first. However, recently my health has forced me to do so.

So, here is my big revelation. I feel I have been put on this earth to help and guide others on their spiritual journey. But, in order to obtain even more compassion and understanding for others, I must experience these trials myself. One of my very favorite movies is called Pay It Forward..although the ending is a bit disturbing...the movie's message is huge! So, if I graciously and humbly receive ALL the love and support I am receiving in this time of need in no matter what form it comes; I will have even MORE to give back when I am able. Basically, I can Pay It Forward! This is how the universe is set up and works. Karma as they say. Not only will I have the experience and awareness of all these trials I have been through, but my cup/pitcher will be filled back up and over flowing with love ready to be poured back out. Therefore, from this day forward, I am going to receive this help with the knowing that I can give it back ten fold to others in need when I get well enough to do so. And all my friends can have the knowing that they took part in helping to pay it forward! Watch the movie if you have not, it is powerful...two of my favorite actors Helen Hunt and Kevin Spacey are in it.

Let's talk about R E C E I V I N G...

Ok, can I just talk a little bit about this thing called receiving again. This whole thing has been VERY uncomfortable for me. I have always struggled with receiving, but have definitely gotten better with that through the years. However, receiving money from others I have never done and it is very, very hard and humbling. My therapist and sponsor assure me that this is part of my healing process ...to soak in the gifts as healing, loving energy. I guess because I feel like crawling out of my own skin I am probably making a positive change and doing something good for myself.

I think my biggest struggle is a big part of me does not feel worthy or deserving. Not because I am not a good person....but that there are so many others out there that may need it more than me....it is not as if I am homeless....or in a critical care unit...or have no food in my cupboards...so it is hard to be able to accept so many offerings.

Today I received an email from a friend of mine, Tim, who told me he has sent a check in the mail to my sponsor Marilyn to contribute....and once again I am filled with these feelings of complete uncomfortableness. Don't get me wrong...I feel so very blessed to have such amazing friends in my life....it is just that they all give me so much already just by being there as my friend. I obviously need to bring this up to my therapist again today when I see her.

Visitors and Packing...

Today I have just been doing 10 things at once trying to get ready. But, I also had 3 visitors. My friend Amy came over to pick up her Stampin' Up! order and to visit. Then, my massage client Diane, came by to show me her 23 pages or so of scrapbooking she just finished of her adorable new grandson to inspire me on my projects. Then, my long time friend John (known as "military john" since I have other friends named John) came by to visit. We were suppose to go to dinner, but I was not feeling well enough to eat so we just hung out. In between all of that I started packing a box with DVDs, CDs, books, puzzles and various other things I am going to send to myself so that I will have some things to keep my mind off the enemas! I also worked on more auto paying bills, yardwork and other things off that to do list. It was soooooooooooo beautiful out today! For feeling so crappy physically, I do feel very, very blessed.

I AM CRAWLING OUT OF MY SKIN!

oh yea....more to say since earlier today....I got two surprises in the mail yesterday. My friend Jill dropped off an inspirational card and note in my mail slot. And my friend Garry sent me a check. Then, today, my client, Genevieve brought me a beach bag with some goodies in it when she came to receive her last massage this morning. Then, after I was done working; my massage client, Kathy, also came by to visit. She brought me a belated Valentine's Day gift and a guardian angel stone to look over me while I am there. She also gave me some cash as she was originally going to send me flowers over there, but thought I could probably use this more.

I do not think I have received like this ever in my life and believe me I AM CRAWLING OUT OF MY SKIN. My sponsor and therapist are encouraging me to just soak it all in. It makes me think of when I used to work with all the teenagers...a fellow youth worker of mine and I would always conduct this positive affirmation session with the youth by having one of them sit in the middle of the circle while all the others sit around that person and give them compliments. Well, the only thing the person in the middle is allowed to say is..."uh-huh, tell me more, thank you, oh yea give me more, yes you are so right, bring it on, keep it coming, etc.!" At first the youth would hate it, but pretty soon they really got into it. I guess I need to practice what I preach as they say....or fake it til I make it!

SO THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT....KEEP IT COMING!! BIG HUGS!

Four More Days of Real Food!

Counting today, I have four more days to eat any type of food I would like, but the bummer part is I am not really able to enjoy it because I am in too much discomfort to really eat much. I also have twelve more days til I leave....and I am sooooo ready to go!....yet I am sooooo NOT ready.... I had a rough night again last night...up and down all night with lots of pain. I am so exhausted as I also have a full work day today. I have so many things still to do to get ready to go, yet my body is saying...can we go already?

Starting to Say My Goodbyes

I have been working a ton this week and saying goodbye to a lot of dear, dear clients. Yesterday was a stronger day for me, but today has not been so good again. I am currently having a lot of pain. I have also started saying goodbye to some dear friends. Yesterday, I met up with my girlfriends Lori and Leslie to say good bye. If you live here locally in San Diego, you must go check out Lori's artwork at The French Pastry Cafe' located at 5550 La Jolla Blvd. The entire restaurant is filled with her art and ONLY her art and it is SOOOOOOOO GOOD! I am telling you this girl is T A L E N T E D!!!!!! The food there is also good. Thanks Leslie for lunch! :0)

Today, I went to lunch with my girlfriend Diana...only 4 more days of regular food! I do not usually eat out this much, but enjoying whatever I want to eat for my last few days. Tonight, I went over to my friend's David and Yvette to see their MOST ADORABLE son, Lucas, who is 6.5 months of complete and perfect cuteness...what a flirt he is! ...oh yea and I guess I went to see David and Yvette, too, to say my goodbyes....teehee. Tomorrow I start work at 8am so need to try to go get some rest. This might be one of those familiar second home (see 2/13/07 entry) nights...but I hope not.

14 Days Left!

I have not written in here for a few days. I have really not been feeling too well, but today I have felt stronger. I have been really swamped with trying to close down my massage business, setting up some referals for my clients to utilize while I am gone, compiling a list of things to go over with my roommate, making spare keys to my home for friends to help out, corresponding with the Hawaii office to deal with weaning off of my current medicine, going to local doctors for a lower dosage of the medication so I can wean off, going to eye doctor to get new contacts, setting up auto pay for all my bills, doing my taxes, getting my car smogged so I can send in registration before I leave, closing up Stampin' Up! orders, etc.

I leave in exactly two weeks from today. Infact at this time in two weeks I will be in Hawaii just getting settled in my new temporary home. I am definitely excited, but I am a bit scared, too. I think about my first night being in a house with people I do not know in a strange bed...maybe I should bring Tubby, Sneakers, or Kermi with me?

Ok...until next time....

good night,
Anne

Full of Gratitude Today

I feel so very blessed by so many people that have been carrying me through! I had my last movie night for a while on Saturday night and it was so very nice to see so many show up so I could see them and get some hugs before I go. My friends are so amazing and love me unconditionally. They always just cheer me on and are being so very supportive. I can not explain the magnitude of impact this has had on me being able to move forward.

My Massage Clients Rock!

JOHN, one of my massage clients, dropped off on my door step more Gerson Therapy information and supplements the other day. PEGGY, came on Thursday night for her very last massage before I go, and left with words of encouragement and a hug. PAT, another dear massage client, came on Wednesday for a massage with a good luck/get well gift in hand and a warm smile. She said she was so excited for me and was really supportive of me going. GARRY, came for a massage on Friday for his birthday, brought me some more Gerson Therapy Books and left me with a more than usual amount for payment. I am so overwhelmed with the love and support that my clients have been providing when in reality I could have been presented with much more dissappointment and upset feelings since I am taking away something that is important to their own well-being. My massage clients are the BEST....I will miss them!

Want Some Cheese with that Wine?

I apologize for my LONG 'whining' email yesterday. I guess some days are just like that. I am not feeling much better today, but I will spare you another long gripe (grape stomping) session. I am now going to sign off as I need to figure out how to set up all my bills to be set for auto pay and then I have another doctor appointment tonight at 530pm. Yes, I know very unusual, but she sees me on Saturdays in the late afternoon!

A Day in the Life of Anne

Well, today was not a good day at all! Somedays are better than others if I am able to get into gratitude and try to just trust the process and have faith. But, I guess today was not one of those days. I am just so dang tired and my body is screaming at me. I feel like I have been climbing this up hill battle forever and I just need to rest....but everyday I awake to more urgent things I need to do to move forward with all in the name of trying to restore my health.

I woke this morning out of a sound sleep at 4 am because I had to make an emerency bathroom run, but I was grateful that I at least got like 4 straight hours of sleep before this happened. Some nights I am up all night and others I sleep for 8-10 straight. But, usually, once I am awake it is hard to get back to sleep because I am in a lot of pain and discomfort. So, I decided to just get up and start my day at about 5am...this is a miracle as I have never been a morning person. But, I may as well get up and be productive as I have so many things to do to get ready to leave town.

My day started with a doctor apt. at 9am and then to the pharmacy and back home to work on massage client then back to the pharmacy and then the doctor because I was given the wrong type of medication. Then, I got back home and was on phone with hawaii clinic for an hour then had to speak to the local Gerson office in San Diego. More complications and miscommunications. So, I spent the next hour emailing the doctor in Hawaii.

SO, NOW HERE IT IS 830PM....and that was my whole day....I had a list of 20 things to do today and I did not do a one! Well, thanks for listening, I really need to just go get some rest and try to start over again tomorrow.

Thanks Goes Out to Keith & Susan!

Another Big Thank You goes to Keith and Susan...two of my long standing massage clients! They have both been coming to get massages once a week for several years now...and have become a big part of my monthly income. They presented me with a bonus check tonight to help pay for my medical expenses at the clinic while I am gone. I am overwhelmed with the support and love I am receiving!!